Hello Katy,
We are excited about getting to go to California and that you and Jeremy will be attending. I have been fretting about which belt to wear so that it will match my shoes. Each shoe is a shade of black but one reflects sunlight more and even more shocking is one shoe might be shiner that the other. Although my right shoe gets a little more workout than the left one.
Picking out a shirt and tie has been horrific. You can't imagine the combinations of white, cream or ivory shirts that are available. Should I wear cream colors if the groom wears ivory or should we both be the same? It is really wearing on my soul as to which one will be the choicest. Really I like the white shirt but then what color tie should be worn? Will the tie clash with my shoe strings since my pant legs might not cover them totally? I was appalled that the black buttons on my vest might contrast with the shine on my shoes but I can solve that with a little sun tan lotion on each button. I don't think anyone will notice. What do you think?
What type hair color should I wear? Should I try some of that stuff that darkens your hair slightly or just be normal. You know I don't want to look too old nor should my hair do clash with the bride's father's hair. He is taller and has darker hair. All these decisions are just mind boggling and are just where my hair use to be.
How should I smell? Being on the Pacific Coast I was thinking a soft salty smell would go well. Something from off the ocean like Old Spice but what if the aroma clashed with the bride's flowers? Perfumes smashing into cologne could develop into a disturbance. The flower on my lapel might wilt if too much fragrance should dominate its DNA structure. Having a wilty lapel flower could dampen the entire wedding scene. What do you suggest? And what if the wind blows in from the north instead of off the Pacific waters? It is no telling what I will smell like then. I am beginning to have worries about what Red Wood tree pollen would do to my Old Spice toilette. I will just take a bottle of English Leather in case the north wind blows toward us.
How long before the wedding should I shave? West Coast guys like the "evening shadow look" to make them look debonair but I think I am beyond that stage of life. Shaving just before the wedding could leave some cut marks that would need to be tidied up. Probably using a good after shave cream could solve that problem, but too shinny a face could clash with my shoes if the sunlight hits them both at the same time. Perhaps I could go back to the store that had the dull looking, non shinny black shoes and purchase them just in case we have an extra sunshiny wedding day. That is a good idea.
Just wanted to bounce some idea off your thinking cap. Wedding can be tough on an old guy. Selecting all the right stuff can be stressful. Thanks for listening. Uncle Wayne
Hey Unc,
We are so excited aswell, especially since we are able to spend an extra day after the nuptiuals! Now on to more pressing business. I would like inform you that I am here to erase your wardrobe worries. I will address each issue in the order previously addressed in the above email.
Shoes: I suggest wearing the shiner shoe on the foot that gets less of a workout for one day before the wedding so they will both have equal sheen. (the extra wear will reduce the extra shine, thus equal matte finish)
Belt: I suggest going with a flat black. No one wants to call attention to their midsection with a flashy patent leather belt.
Shirt: This is a biggie! Since you are in fact the father of the groom, I suggest wearing the same color shirt so you will not clash when standing next to each other in the post ceremony pictures. Tie color choice can be a dicey subject, but I will rescue from a sleepless night and suggest a classic black. Simple, elegant, and very James Bond. It seems that you have already averted the too dull vest button problem with the genius ideas of a dab of sun tan lotion to reflect the sun's rays and Kendra's beaming smile. Well done grasshopper.
Hair: I believe you will be stunning wearing your natural hair color. This is the same choice I am making for Jeremy and myself. Au naturale is in! In addition I have heard West Coast fashionistas are loving the "silver fox" look.
Scent: I must say I'm impressed that you even thought to think of your wedding day scent. Most men overlook this all too important aspect. Smell is just as important a wedding attendant as the minister performing the ceremony! I like the Old spice toilette, it is a classic; however for this day I really would encourage you to branch out and do something special. A beach wedding, such as we are attending, will have a very clean breezy scent scheme. To blend in and not overpower or clash this constellation of salt breeze and roses I suggest bathing in Donkey's milk soap, moisturizing with Donkey's milk lotion, and topping off with just a splash of Nautica after-shave. These aromas will assuredly melt in to a scent symphony sure to brighten Frances's dazzling eyes!
Shave: Not for fret for I have just the trade secret for too shiny face! If you ideed want that clean shaven look, I can dust a translucent powder on the freshly shaven areas that will inhibit excessive shine, yet allow your natural glow to be seen. Don't worry about it being cakey or any loose powder getting on your lapel, I will keep a touch up compact and catch all bandana for in between takes of pictures.
I sure hope these tips will put your mind to rest! Remember the best accessory is your smile, so be sure to wear it proudly (and floss ;) Also, if all else fails remember California is liberal and going nude is perfectly acceptable. Just wear your cowboy boots so everyone will know where you come from!
Love ya,
Katy
Katy,
Thanks for the help. I will put in my cowboy boots. as a back up. I don't know which pair will match my physique best. May have to go for a stroll on the beach to get a public opinion. Uncle Wayne.
Sorry Mom and Aunt Frances, but this was too funny. I love you! I know you both will look beautiful and perfectly dressed! However incase you decide to throw caution to the wind I suggest these beauties:
I know Mr. Mcgreagor would be proud!
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